Home Sweet Home. 

Is it still as sweet as ever? 

it is a definite no, if you asked me.

I'm studying yet they can be outside shouting and quarreling. 

fancy a 30year old quarreling with a 11year old.

How am i supposed to study in this kind of environment? 

i'd thought about it for a long time.

is this place really suitable for me to study.

Had sort of a cold war with mum. 

i was feeling terrible ever since ytd till now.

It was a terrible feeling that no one can understand.

It's like you're flying a kite. the more you're pulling the string, the more it'll break.

i guess this is what had happened to my mother and i.

the feeling of you giving up your mother is the lousiest feeling i had felt on earth.

I didn't want to give up on her. but i felt that, that was the best choice.

I'm not going to let her doings affect my studies.

like what yun said, i'm doing all these all for myself. i'm working hard for myself.

I'll never ever turn into another gambler like her! NEVER! 

i don't understand why people will think like if your mother is a gambler, 

you as her daughter will turn out to be like her in future.

Come on.. I've my on dreams that i wanna pursue.

Why are they linking me and my mother up. i don't understand.

I don't wish to be some typical housewife staying at home looking after kids.

i wanna be a woman that can balance my job and family well.

I don't want my future family to end up like now i'm facing.

how i wish my family could be like the past again.. 

filled with happiness. 

once again.. I cried terribly w/o caring how the others look at me....